My 103rd Post: Being Sorry

Life is based upon decisions and the steps we take....we move through time, wrestling the barriers in our way, towards the goals set in the back image of our mind....at times, we just move on slaying each and everyone...though not literally but stamping one's heart may be same as slaying that person....when at last we reach the end of our trail, a time comes when we look back at what we did in order to reach our destination....then we realise how many we might have hurt and how many we might have left behind just to conquer our selfish desires....if our conscience remains till the end, it nudges our heart just to remind us of what we did....it makes us feel guilty and in the end, we start feeling sorry for what we did or how we behaved....
Being sorry is a strong deed....it shows that at least one realises his/her mistakes....in that state it feels as if a burden is placed upon the heart, heavy enough to sink a person in thin air.....there is an urge which seems to strangle to death just to get things back as they were...just to get a second chance to alter the mistake and remove the hurt from the victim's heart....though the victim might have moved on from your abuse, it still feels as if you can see that someone, crying in a corner just waiting for the day to end or throwing things in fury just to get back on you....but at that moment, you just moved on and couldn't wait long enough to know what happened next or weren't ever concerned enough to care to know how that someone feels.....
Life has a philosophy that broken things can be mended and broken hearts, can once again reunite under the same glowing moon....that is just a philosophy and we can call this an ideal situation, which can not be obtained....it is a fact stated in physics that worldly things can't reach to ideal state....same way, broken hearts and hurt souls can not be repaired just by a sorry....it is just like breaking a class and gluing it back together....though the shattered pieces might hug each other, but still they remain weak from the impact and won't hold the water without spilling it here and there.....saying sorry won't make things better for the one who was thrashed, though he/she might accept you once more, but still would remain few steps back just to ensure the future....
I fully understand my stated points but there is something which nags me....there is a saying that do not let your hope die young...well I guess I just said that though what I mean is that, maybe, just maybe that someone agrees and after the show of stubbornness and ignore, that someone reverts and accepts your apology....maybe that someone becomes that same old person realising the fact that one is trying too hard just to apologise and is trying to get back on track....so there is hope though....it might be tough but there are chances....now the tough part is that how to make that someone realise the fact that you really mean it....umm I really don't know....
The way I would do is to write a post upon a topic, lets suppose 'Being Sorry', and then try to share it towards that someone....this might irritate that person and make him/her take the agreement of your kill, but still I tried.....it depends upon that someone whether they think am worth giving a chance or not but I guess anyone would spare a single chance if I keep on asking for her/him and wish well...
Well that is just an opinion but try not to hurt in the first place to be sorry later in the future....

My 64th Post: A Drift Towards An Old Memory

As I recall, it was Saturday, 26th of April of the year 2008....it wasn't officially a school day because we had our exams coming in and before that, it is a period of preparation so being absent doesn't really counts but still we were called in to watch a movie titled 'Stranger than Fiction'...this whole setup was covered by our English teacher who really wanted us to learn something and grab ideas for the essays in the paper but I had no intention of watching that film for that I would like to apologize to her....anyhow, the graduating batch was busy the whole day in group photos and enjoying their last moments as a batch because they already had gone through their farewell party and the next time they would reunite was going to be during the exams....so clearly, senior section had no motives of studying....
Well just after four and a half years, I saw that movie right now...still, the movie couldn't appeal me much but brought me back to that day....I had some work upon my mind and was plotting ways to successfully do it...so with that fuss in my head, I wasn't able to concentrate upon the movie or anything else....I really wanted that stuff to be perfect but as people say, when you over think something, disasters happen...well not exactly a disaster but things didn't quite go as I planned...or in other words, there was no plan at all because I had thought of doing it but forgot to think how I was going to do it....I tried but when it failed, I had nothing else to do except backing down at least for a while...I troubled few people that day but still it means a lot to me because that day I realized the fact that the friends I was with, are really my true friends because they supported me in my bad time....
Rest of the day wasn't really that happy but still those memories would definitely last forever....I know, I was a kid back then and even the little things matter a lot but I didn't know that my mind would treasure them like this....today, this film is the reason I am blogging right now because it gave me something to write upon....though I still don't know the ending of that movie, all I know is that it holds a key to a part of my memory....
Things bad or good, sometimes cling to the memory lane....whenever they come in front of us or appear somewhere, we jump in the past and play those flash backs....at times, it is a pleasant feeling but sometimes it gets irritating or depressing....my memory is somehow a pleasant thought for me so instead of falling back, I am here writing about it but for some, it may not be that good....there are few options available at those moments...either to avoid them or try not to encounter them....I came across because I was surfing channels so honestly, I wasn't able to avoid it and may happen with anybody else...so just try to be strong and get past it....it's just a memory and bad memories can be ignored with a thought that you are living in present and heading towards your future where one day that memory would flush down because you earned something better to bypass that....
So take care, keep smiling and keep cherishing those memories and yeah, do share my blog as well.....

My 7th Post: LIE

It is a simple three letter word which has the power to manipulate world's most strongest mind...lie, means a deception.....such a statement, which can't be proved but yet exists cause the creator of that lie believes in the manipulation....
Through out centuries, from the time 'Lie' was invented, there has been a change in coarse in the behavior of people....they have started to take things for granted and most of them feel that lying is the best way to cover up their flaws...they really don't care who they are hurting or what the consequence might be....they only want to feel safe and for a while, they do...
All the liars, do they ever think that lying breaks someone's heart? it really hurts when the person you really trusted or you thought would remain sincere to you lies just cause to hide something which is meaningless....yes I believe that something meaningless to someone, may be valuable to other but instead of lying, the topic can be ended or the truth can be told.....if someone lies in order to save someone else and that lie doesn't involves you then it is a different case but if someone lies about something which is kinda a part of your life, that hurts....
Like for example, someone states that he/she goes to sleep at around 1 am and after that it would be difficult to talk to you cause of family issues or etc and closes it with a statement asking you to trust what he/she said....you trusted the whole statement but after a while get to know that whatever you were told, only meant for you....instead of sleeping, that someone is busy with other friends and keeps on chatting....it becomes clear that all of that was a lie....this is not a big issue at all....the person didn't want to talk to you further so made up a story so that a boundary could be set up but lying was never the option....when it is acknowledged that it was a lie, the distance increases in the relation....someone close to you lied just to ditch you for no good is like buying a Rolls Royce and giving it to your wife to drive (no offence girls :P)...instead of lying, he/she could have said clearly that they wanna maintain a distance or something like that....
In other case someone may lie to their little kid on the death of his/her father that daddy is gone on a trip to some place....and when the time comes, they reveal the truth...lying in order to keep someone's heart is not a crime...lying is a crime only till it hurts someone or ruins something...
Like in the first example, the person lied to, won't trust the liar again and would like to go away from him/her cause the trust dies with a lie...and it should be kept in mind that lies never remain alive forever, a day comes when the light of truth reveals the true identity.....

Take care people and please avoid from lying cause that hurts and one day the same could happen to you.....